Non-Zero Chance

Non-Zero Chance

The Brunching Shuttlecocks Features



Hate meat, but love the suffering it symbolizes? Want to eat more healthy foods, but don't want to give up the delicious flavor of once-living flesh cut down in its prime? Then try new Vicious Vegan Entrees, for everyone who wants a healthy body and a sick mind!

Soy Veal

The delicious taste of a baby cow raised in inhuman captivity has never been available in soy form -- until now! You can practically taste the misery!

"Last Bite" Endangered Soy Entrees

Eating an endangered species may be illegal, but not eating something that tastes like an endangered species. By consulting a team of convicted poachers, we've been able to come up with our "Last Bite" line, each with the flavor of an endangered animal. Try Soy Snow Tiger, Soy Panda, Soy Condor, and our personal favorite, Soy Baby Harp Seal.

Soy Human

We've taken the Most Dangerous Game, and made it into the Most Delicious Meal! Each slice of carefully-textured Vicious Vegan Soy Human tastes so much like the real thing, you'll think you're eating a friend! Available in Sinewy Dock Worker, Fat-Marbled Senator, and new Choir Boy.

Vicious Vegan Side Dishes

These are just vegetables and herbs, but we kill an animal anyway! We just whack it over the head and dump its body in a landfill, so that you can eat hearty in the knowledge that you're still at the top of the food chain.

Vicious Vegan -- A Plate Full of Hate

More Brunching More by Lore Sjöberg Back to The Shuttlecocks Homepage